M.I.A.

Missing in action is how I've been feeling for about a week now. I have been under the weather for over a week but this week just took me down. I finally went to the doctor and I am on the road to feeling better. This is why I haven't blogged in a week. Here is what I realized though.... it is hard to be a mommy who is sick! For me to get better when I am sick, I need plenty of sleep. Well plenty of sleep doesn't happen around here anymore. Sometimes it is hard to put Lillian first and suck it up. This is just another aspect that I am trying to adjust to. When I used to get sick, someone was there to help take care of me or at least to give me sympathy while I whine. Now it is all about taking care of Lillian. Don't get me wrong, she will always be taken care of and nurtured, but sometimes I want to be selfish. This is what I was used to for all of my life before mommyhood. I am just sitting her wondering what happens say if I get the flu?? Does Lee stay home and care for Lillian while I am stuck in bed, or do I just get up and try and act like nothing is going on?? My question is: How sick is too sick to be mommy?? Wow, being a mother is harder than I ever imagined. It tests your limits and it forces you to reevaluate your own needs. I need to be less selfish. It is like a bad habit that I have to break. This process is a slow one to be honest with you but it is happening. I am so thankful that God is with me for every slow step I make. Sometimes I feel like I am the only Mom that feels this way, but I know there are others. I guess I need to stop comparing myself to other moms. I just see all these other moms and they are like "wonder mom" and I am far from that. Maybe it is a learned practice? I know I am doing my best, I just feel that sometimes I can do better.

Well enough of the negativity.. I just thought I would share a little bit of what has been on my mind lately.

Do you know what tomorrow is?????
Lillian Grayce will be SIX MONTHS old! This calls for an OMG!
The time just goes by so quickly. Everyone says it does but you don't realize it until you are there. She is doing new things by the day. She now eats rice cereal every day for dinner but she still doesn't really care for it. Lillian is sitting up much better by the day as well. She is so interested in the world she is in. We have some busy days coming up. Birthday tomorrow, visit to the pumpkin patch on Saturday, Halloween on Sunday, 6 month pictures on Monday and 6 month checkup on Tuesday. Whew I am tired just thinking about it all, but we are going to have so much fun! I am curious to see how long she is now. I know she is 14 lbs because we took her to the doctor this week. We thought she might have a cold but it just turned out that she is EXTREMELY congested. So the saline spray has become our new friend or enemy in Lillian's case.

We also had a quick trip to Pigeon Forge last weekend. Lillian got to visit with grandparents, great grandparents and family. She made lots of new friends as well. We took her to church for the first time. I even let her stay in the nursery during the service. Huge step, I know but only because of the wonderful people I knew who would be taking care of her. So thank you to those who were in the nursery on Sunday morning! I wouldn't have been able to do it without you there. We all had a great time over the weekend!

I will have lots to blog about in the coming days and I hope to be able to keep up with it! Thanks for reading!